


Organization XIII Orders Pizza

by Taliax



Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: Crack, Exactly What It Says on the Tin, Gen, Humor, Pie, Xemnas/Kingdom Hearts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-08-01
Updated: 2011-08-01
Packaged: 2018-01-13 21:59:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 719
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1242118
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Taliax/pseuds/Taliax
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Xigbar's exploded the kitchen, and it's up to Saix to help the Organization get along for long enough to decide on what kind of pizza to order.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Organization XIII Orders Pizza

“Xemnas is busy today, so I was asked to hold this meeting,” Saïx began, addressing the Organization in the Room Where Nothing Meets.

“Busy with what, proclaiming his undying love for Kingdom Hearts again?” Axel sniggered to himself.

Saïx ignored him. “Xigbar exploded the kitchen again, so until the Dusks can finish rebuilding, we will have to order food.”

“I vote ice cream!” Roxas yelled, waving his arm in the air.

Saïx sighed. “No, Roxas, you can’t order ice cream. We can order from The Pizza Hut That Never Was, The Pizza Inn that Never Was, or The McDonalds That Wasn’t.”

“Er, The McDonalds That Wasn’t?” Roxas asked, confused.

“They were trying to be original,” Axel explained.

“Ooh, Pizza Inn has chocolate chip pizza!” Demyx yelled.

Xigbar laughed. “Remember, you can’t have sugar anymore. Not after last time.”

“But that was an accident! I didn’t mean to-“

Saïx interrupted him. “No, Demyx. That’s an order. And Xigbar, since you exploded the kitchen, you don’t get a vote.”

“Aw, come on,” Demyx whined.

“The kitchen wouldn’t have exploded if Miss Antenna over there hadn’t been so impatient she made me put the burrito in the microwave with the wrapper on.” Xigbar jerked a thumb at Larxene.

“That was no burrito, that was a bomb, and you were going to put it in there anyway! And I needed my mac and cheese!” Larxene complained.

“Well, I vote peperoni,” Axel said calmly, interrupting Larxene’s incoming rant.

“I want a pizza with pickled daikon.”

“Zexion, neither store sells that kind.” Saïx pinched the bridge of his nose in annoyance. “Can you all just decide on a pizza? I don’t care what kind we get. Unless someone objects, it’s peperoni.”

“I don’t care,” said Xaldin. Lexaeus grunted in agreement.

“I would rather have vegetable pizza,” Marluxia inputted, weaving a flower petal through his fingers.

“Yuck.” Demyx stuck out his tongue. “Anything but that!”

“I’m pretty sure Demyx would starve himself before he even touched a vegetable,” Axel commented.

“Is there ice cream pizza?” Roxas asked.

“No, there is not.” This whole meeting was starting to drive Saïx crazy, but Xemnas had specifically said to listen to everyone. Maybe it was to see if they could get along for ten minutes without being at each other’s throats.

“I say we play poker to decide who gets to pick the pizza,” Luxord suggested, fanning out his cards in one hand.

“I’m starving! Just pick something without wasting time on a moronic card game!” Larxene objected.

“Besides, you always win,” Demyx complained.

“I bet he stacks the deck,” Axel muttered.

“Vexen? Do you have an opinion?” Saïx asked the only member who hadn’t spoken.

“Finally, you take the time to listen to your elders. I vote that because I have seniority, I get to choose, and I choose anchovies.”

Demyx gaged, and Axel stifled a laugh.

“Vexen, just because you are the oldest doesn’t mean you get to make the rules,” Saïx said.

“Yeah, this is a democracy,” Axel said, “a democracy where Xemnas rules everything and it doesn’t matter what the rest of us say.”

Saïx glared at Axel for a moment before saying, “Since no-one has a DECENT reason to object, I’ll order peperoni.”

After Saïx said this, Xemnas unexpectedly appeared out of a dark corridor on his chair. “Has everyone agreed on what to eat?” He asked in his annoyingly slow voice.

“Not quite, Lord Xemnas,” Saïx responded.

“In that case, I veto all the suggestions which have been put forth so far, and we shall eat pie.”

“See what I mean?” Axel whispered.

“Um, Superior, where will we get the pie from?” Saïx asked with hesitation.

“Why, from my secret pie storage unit, of course.” With that, Xemnas disappeared, probably off to get the pie.

“Yes, so more sugar ban!” Demyx yelled, punching his fist in the air before leaving the Round Room through a portal.

“I feel sorry for whoever’s near Demyx when he goes on a sugar high,” Axel said, leaving.

“Maybe there’s ice cream pie!” Roxas said optimistically before departing.

Vexen was still feeling annoyed. “I never get any respect around here.”

One by one the members opened portals to leave, until only Saïx was left.

_Hmph, I was actually hoping to eat peperoni pizza._

And then he left, too.


End file.
